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"These pieces were recorded live, before audiences, also live . .
Most of the material is my own, stolen from the plain people of Ireland, re-sprayed, re-moulded, re-bored and given false number plates.

The cynical exclusion of some well-known crudities, in the interests of public morality, may shock some of my friends, but Business is Business, and they get enough of that kind of thing at home".


“I’m not proud of being a Cork man, just grateful.”


“I stopped drinking about 25 years ago due to a combination of medical and domestic pressures, let’s put it that way,” he laughs.  “A man said to me ‘was the drink giving you problems? and I said ‘Oh no! It wasn’t giving me problems, it was giving everybody else problems.”


"I don’t mind who they have me playing as long as I get paid," he laughs.


“Ireland for many centuries was known as the island of saints and scholars and this is an image that has taken an awful whallopin’ in the last few years.  Although we did have an upsurge of sainthood with the elevation of blessed Oliver Plunkett, which was a source of great personal satisfaction to me because as a kid I used to bring in a penny a week to the nuns for his canonization . . . And this is the only long shot I’ve ever brought off.”


“I have a girl in San Francisco,” he said before quickly correcting himself. “I should say I have a daughter in San Francisco – you’ll not find any sex scandals here.”


"I think New York is a great city, because it’s old enough to have tradition and at the same time you can live in central Manhattan and never have to own a car or take a taxi anywhere."


"I always regarded myself as a serious straight actor, but when I did the Friel play, which was a comedy part in a straight play, I went down a storm and people didn't want to see me do anything else.“


“I think there’s always going to be a market for storytellers. I think that when people go into a pub and someone starts tell a story if it’s anyway interesting they’ll get an audience.  It’s like the story someone told about Dublin pubs: you go in there, having a nice quiet drink, thinking your own thoughts and feeling very happy and then a Dublin man comes in and decides to rescue you.”


“I’ve always got a lot of work . . . the older you get the less opposition you have.  They’re all dying off and if you can live long enough you can get all the parts.”


Of all school subjects, Mathematics, in all its torturing manifestations, was of no interest to me.”
 

“Why steal scenes?  Why steal shows?  Why steal thunder?  It is Thespian kleptomania.”

Wisdom & Wisecracks